Cage Critique Gifts

Father Parrot: 'One day Son, this will all be yours.'

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

"Without question the funniest patient I’ve ever lost."

Roads with a view.

Actually, Mama was her third word. Buy Now were her first two.

"Frankenstein? Isn't the story of a being made from the parts of others a little far-fetched?" "I find it very believable."

Man falls off perch

Boris Johnson lies his way out of trouble

'The following program was made possible by a totally unscrupulous sponsor....'

"Dad should stick to technology, because his art is horrible."

'GESUNDHEIT, EVERYBODY!', 'That's his idea of universal health care.'

New Age Anatomy...

'He's supposed to be the world's oldest turtle!'

Hamster.

'I think he wants a larger cage.'

"That was a boring field trip."

If they didn't show commercials, people would not know what to buy.

'All our effluent is green. Shouldn't that win us points with environmentalists?'

'I can totally draw better than this.'

Some other drugs you may enjoy.

"And if you sign up for our Gold Star membership level we stop pestering you to sign up."

"Why would leaders agree to be honored with a mattress sale?"

'If you can overlook the newspaper on the floor, this isn't bad for a starter home.'

"My wife says I never listen to her ... or something like that."

"I lined it up with our prenup."

UFC on steroids...

'Imprisoned for life? Are you sure?'

'Whoever said 'Free As A Bird' didn't know a thing.'

Battery Hens.

'The patient said he brushed regularly, but his dentist knew better.'

'Want to really freak her out? Start coughing!'

'Adam was okay, but I'd like the next project to be more user-friendly.'