Cafe Culture Connoisseurs T-Shirts

"Do you realize I haven't had a raise in twelve years?"

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

Hats and Food

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

"I'll have a cup of coffee, and would you mind removing that ridiculous painting and turning off the Wilco?"

"The Leonardos, the Raphaels, Titians, Veroneses, Giottos... Italy wants them back, all 427 of them."

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

Yummy Mummies

"Please hold applause until end of dragon."

'Who's the new guy?'

"Tell me what you think of the menu. I wrote it."

"By 'genius' do they mean the artist or the marketing department?"

'Bring me another coffee would you...'

National Coffee Day

"It's a pumpkin spice latte pie latte."

'How would you like your toast?'

The Kali De Milo.

'Kafka! Kandinsky! Kokoschka!'

Count Valmont- Proposed Titlepage to 'Les Liasons Dangereuses'

"You have an air of Camille Paglia about you."

"I can't wait for things to get back to normal."

Chinese History: Redwash

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

What's the insect de jour?

'It is so nice to be able to take a break mid trip...'

Antonin Leopold Dvorak

"I only drink decaf, otherwise I'm awake up to four hours a day."

Meanwhile at the Cafe de la Mort...

"Now we're leaving the hall of stuff we stole from other cultures and entering the hall of stuff we paid too much for."