Cable Tv Aficionado Gifts

"This medication may interact with paying your rent and being able to afford cable."

Nearly a third of the earth's life-forms have gone extinct. Cut! Stop with all the facts. This is debate club! But we're using a cable tv talk show format! What should I say? Unsupported opinions

'You read? What kind of entertainment is that?'

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

Royal Mail boss to become ITV boss.

Television Readers.

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

"Well, the remote's not dowmn the back of the couch."

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

"I find that hugely offensive!"

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

TV-Man

"I know! Two years without anymore Game Of Thrones?"

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

'Someday TVs will be in big boxes on the floor.'

'We need you to settle a bet -- was 'Twilight Zone' a sitcom or a documentary?'

TV jester.

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

We saw this episode of Grey's Anatony, I recognize the symptoms.

'Contrary to the popular view, our studies show that it is real life that contributes to violence on television.'

Big screen TV.

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

'Poll results are in...90% of Americans can't spell Schwarzenneger.'

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?

"Which news channel should we watch?"

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

"It's wonderful to be away from the rat race. So, what happened on 'CSI: Miami' last night?"

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.