Business World Commentator Gifts

'It says our line printer is obsolete our remote terminal is obsolete, and I'm afraid, we're obsolete.'

"Unfortunately, Whitcomb, I am suffering from compassion fatigue."

'Now that you've risen to second in command of this company, Oswald, remember just one thing. To me you're still just a flunky.'

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

"DeepSeek" "Stargate"

The Shrinking Dollar.

"You weren't expecting a walrus, right?"

'This year, executive bonuses are tied to performance. You owe us $50,000.'

'Tesco's cheif executive meets with staff.'

"Shankar, I needed someone to dot the 'I's' and cross the 'T's' but that was before there was ChatGPT."

'Enter His Royal Globalness...'

'If your boss is so dumb, daddy, why did he hire you?'

"Miss Jones, bring me into the 21st century..."

"I liked it better when you used gobbledygook."

'I wouldn't worry about the retirement plan. You'd have to be out of your mind to work here that long.'

'Next on 'evening shouting match'...is it a bull or bear market?'

"Since when did economists become sociologists?!"

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

Bribes.

Cold drinks, candy and corporate buyouts.

"Old economy, new economy - some things never change."

"We're going to have a post-flood economy to deal with."

'Never roll your eyes while the boss is talking.'

'And this is Bert, our intern. He's been with the company for 46 years!'

'As we all know, the appearance of honesty is the best policy....'

'A lackluster style got me to where I am, and a lackluster style is going to keep me here.'

This next piece is entitled "Concerto No. 2 in C Minor Blues." Sign the economy's hurting everyone.

"Brodkin, now that the economy is creating jobs at a faster than expected clip, why don't you go out and find yourself one?"

Suggestion Box.

Rebuilding the Economy.

"Thank God your mother didn't live to see what you've become."

Bureau of Inflation.

'I like the jib of their cuts.'

"Trump's election has certainly thrown the cat amongst the pigeons... The only way we'll get through it is to embrace this new world, develop our business strategy around it! So the plan is to build a betterer business, a beautiful business... One where i

There are better responses to 'change' than running around the office screaming 'We're doomed!'