Business Travelers Gifts

'I'm a just-in-time imports/exports executive - I should've gone home Tuesday week!'

"Hey, and I hear congrats are in order for earning 'Super Elite' status in elevator miles!"

'I read the paper you gave at the Iceland Conference on my way to the Hawaii Conference.'

"To make the plane lighter to save time and fuel, we'd like everyone with a computer to delete their large files."

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

'Sir, will that be business or first class?'

"It was a holiday I'll never forget...I saw life in the raw!"

The World's Easiest Airport

"I love these off-site business meetings."

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

'You're off the plane, Hal. Put the laptop on your desk.'

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

'I feel like my ears are about to pop.'

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

Airport

'Hanson - committee of four.'

"Expense account or regular?"

Technological Dependence.

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

'He must be going economy!'

Airport Bored Rooms

'When you said I would go places with the firm , sir, I was rather hoping for more than the annual outings...'

Gates A-B Taking Care of Business, C-D Funny Business, E-F Do Your Business.

'Your luggage went to Bosnia-Herzegovina, sir, and I'm afraid they're holding it for ransom.'

Business-Class.

Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here.

"Hell: The Airport"

"We are now boarding priority travellers. Please be ready to present an air of entitlement."

'Business or pleasure?'

A businessman waits for an elevator; on his briefcase are two stickers reading "Up" and "Down".

Airport Security. Remove Shoes. What do they call the guy in charge of all this airport security? "The TSAR"!

'As a matter-of-fact I didn't pack my own bags...Well,well, well...Speak of the devil!'

John couldn't help but think that his team had a different perspective on the event than he did...

Airline Mergers.

'I thought I'd never say this, but I think we might've traveled too far this time!'