Business Optimizer T-Shirts

"I can't see the POINT of all this emphasis on 'customer care'!"

"I have some ideas on how to increase productivity, improve employee morale and save the company thousands of dollars a year, but I need this job."

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

"Maybe we should have another look at the 'business as usual' idea."

'It's new from British Telecom...a telephone ignoring machine.'

Supply Chain

Miss Pike, send a memo to all members of staff.....Economies must be made.'

'You may have three mergers.'

'You may have found more new customers than the other salesmen, but your profits are too small! Stop just pulling in peanuts, Barry!'

'We've decided to upgrade your position with a new version 2.0 employee.'

"Remember, you're only as sick as you feel."

"Business has been steady."

'Gentlemen, we make money the old-fashioned way, and it's got to STOP!'

"What I want from you, is a big budget event with a low budget, budget."

Wishing Well: Tax reciept available for business related wishes.

'You have the body of a 22 year old man, providing your birthday is February 29th.'

'The town I grew up in was so affluent they used to close the schools in honor of options expiration day.'

'Simpkins, I'd like to introduce you to the secret of my business success.'

"Lay off the junk food, your pancreas is rusty"

'Office real estate' lifting weights

"Hurry up with that cork!"

Derision/Leader/Respect

"Actually, turns out my entire life can take place at 10%."

"I'm from the small business administration...have you ever considered franchising?"

'The way I see it, we only have two choices, we either improve the quality of our product or we hire some really great sales people.'

'Would you be interested in adding a few options?'

'Get me into that 15% tax bracket I've heard so much about.'

'Honestly you could drive a 'coach and horses' through this document, there's no definition of 'weight loss', no time frame, no sanctions.'

Look — if you had one shot or one opportunity to seize everything you ever wanted. One moment — Would you capture it or just let it slip?

"When the dust settles we're all going to be very dusty."