Business Lingo Buff Gifts

' Most recently I've been involved in the manufacture, development, testing and repair of primary bio-components. Kids.'

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

"We need a best practice swim lane to leverage our core competency, move the needle outside the box, and open the kimono while keeping our ducks in a row. Can anyone give me a sustainable solution to more vertical effectiveness without getting too granula

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

Gingerbread Business Classes: Think Outside the Fox.

He used to pass the buck, since being promoted to management he gets to call it delegating authority.

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

"Sophia, will you agree to form a joint exploratory committee for marriage?"

'Your proposal is written with clarity and conviction. Send it up to legal for obfuscation.'

We don't call these savage screaming fits. We call them confrontation verbal interfacing.

"We were looking for somebody with experience in mumbo-jumbo but your resume is mainly about gobbledegook."

'This is gobbledygook. I asked for mumbo-jumbo.'

"Mommy is having another baby. Let me assure you that any paradigm shift will be incremental, core values remain family-centric, and Mommy is committed to assimilation and building synergy."

'Don't you all feel energised, full of enthusiasm for the future!'

"We’re leveraging knowledge of niche opportunities to maximize strategic advantages."

"I made a straightforward proposal, Moira, and all I ask is a linear response."

'I'm tired - let's outsource dinner tonight.'

"The best laid plans of mice and men... differ materially in their objectives."

GDP and G&T.

"Miss Davis, bring me everything we've got on turning a two-bit hole-in-the-wall operation into a multinational juggernaut."

"Al could you unpack these mining issues for us whilst Joel drills down to get some detail on the parcel problem."

'Ladies and gentlemen, we are the best team money can buy. Now LET'S PLAY BALL!'

Digital Marketing

JIT -Jittery Inventory Turnover

'I was a tall, handsome prince, and an evil witch downsized me.'

Clothiers. Suits - Shirts. The salesman uses a lot of business jargon. Welcome! You've done your due diligence. You already know we're a value-add operation here. Great synergies with the suit and accessories! And our tailor can right-size this for you. You'll be able to monetize the strategic acquisition of this suit via enhanced deal-making success! I don't want to "dress for success." I want clothes for repose. I think I have a great head for business but my body never wants to tak

'Ms. Kravetz, find me a euphemism to describe this productivity gain somewhere between resource action and you're all fired.'

"As I mentioned before, Fassler, you'll never go anywhere until you start using 'impact' as a verb."

'Good work, I doubt whether any of the shareholders will understand it.'

"Yes, but...will it scale?"

'My protocol ate your paradigm.'

"There'd be a lot less hemming and hawing if you did a better job of flimming and flamming."

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

"Apropos your request for a salary increase, we're going to have you appraised."