Business Buyout Gifts

"I can't decide which I'd rather do- make a twenty-billion-dollar bid of turn down a twenty-billion-dollar bid."

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

'They sold the company in 2001? I was wondering why things were slow.'

"I suppose just climbing the greasy pole is no longer an option..."

"To summarize the year: we were taken over, we took over, we were taken over and we took over."

"It's Swamp & Swallow - they're making an offer we can't refuse!"

'If we have only fractional ownership, it's not a private jet anymore, is it?'

Under new blame.

"That's Hicks from the corporate office. He's adorable, but trust me—when it comes to acquisitions, he's an animal!"

'Uh - oh... this looks like an unfriendly takeover!'

"The torch is passed, but since the company is going green, I'm passing a high efficiency, solar powered multi LEC prism spotlight."

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

"Pistachio almond—that's the buyout."

"So far it doesn't look like a hostile takeover."

"Oh, no! We've inadvertently gobbled up our own parent company."

'You can't put him out to pasture - he owns the pasture!'

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

"It's strictly business. Please don't take your financial ruin personally."

'There's a gentleman out here with $643 million. He would like to discuss a takeover.'

"Leave Lou to me. I'll eat him and then you can run the company."

"The water does taste a little funny. Maybe they added analgesics, to ease the pain of restructuring."

'Watch it...I'm carrying a concealed weapon...my lawyer.'

"And here you see where we successfully concluded the merger to everyone's mutual benefit."

'Could you be more specific than a king's ransom or an arm and a leg.'

No - None sense, take-charge, inc. - Formerly: Happy-go-lucky, inc.'

'So, summing up: we 'like' you and you 'like' us.'

'Cards for all occasions: takeover, buyouts, mergers, flotation, bankruptcy.'

Predator, Inc bought Prey, Ltd

'What a wonderful day to declare chapter 13!'

'Dairy herd for sale. Going out of business. All prices include cut and wrapped.'

"All this is mine now! I had my lawyers declare you incompetent!"

Let's shake on it.

'Do you think you can turn the company around without making us all dizzy?'