Burial Services Gifts

"Will that be all, sir?"

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

He looks so natural lying there...

"All we have left is standing room only."

'He loved that dog.'

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

"It is now that moment when a close family member tries to speak of the deceased without choking up."

"Promise me that if I die first you won't eat me."

"Good old Frank. He was always thinking of others."

"Personally, I of course loved Uncle Clarence, but Mr. Quibbles wants to say a few things."

'He was hosting a business dinner for 300. Those were his last words.'

'Oh no! I forgot to change his ring tone to the funeral march!'

'He's a conspiracy theorist - he refuses to believe that Great Aunt Mildred is really dead.'

Cricketer's funeral

'I used to be an accountant but I found it too depressing.'

"He intends to die with dignity, he desires a modest funeral, and he's determined to prevent the buzzards from getting any part of the estate."

Here lies BoBo the Clown

"Could you spare a few minutes to give some feedback on your death experience?"

Headstone reading 'Only Sleeping'.

"You must forgive me, I seem to have misplaced my spectacles... Does the best man have the ring?"

A grave with an anchor and periscope

"Hope you don't mind—it was his last request."

"The family has spent all week crafting a beautiful service of words and pictures - far too sentimental to be of practical use."

'He always said he wouldn't be seen dead with his shirt outside his trousers - he'll be livid.'

"Right before I die I'm going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels."

A dead business executive is lowered into the grave with his desk

Dead Man's Handel

Undertaker's Flower Box.

Angels Playing Frisbee with a Halo.

"As always he found a way to duck out of working overtime!"

Existence 2.0

"We need to talk about your driving. Some of your passengers have been complaining."

"Just to be clear, you want suicide doors installed on your hearse?"