Budgie Breeder T-Shirts

'The budgie's been working out with weights again!'

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

'What has twelve legs and barks?'

'Well, they're just great for running down gazelles and jackals!'

'Do you have anything a little longer in the leg ?'

'Another blond hair! You've been making a lot of night calls lately...'

'What's the big thrill about Budgie Jumping!?'

Puppies

"His father came from a family of climbers."

'Sorry Ben, I never noticed the baby-sitting clause in the stud contract.'

Man lets his pigeons out to be fed in the park.

'Boy, am I going to be pleased when the pregnancy is over...'

"You are going to have lots of puppies."

'You reek of crackers.'

"Congratulations. It's a litter."

Good, but not Great Danes.

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

'It's a bloody-cross-breed.'

'He's an octopussy. They're specially bred to catch over 100 mice an hour.'

Dog Calenders.

'I understand you don't have a resume but you do have your pedigree papers?'

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

'I refuse to believe that Winkie was a terrorist.'

Dog Show: Worst of Breed

An inbred poodle.

'Perhaps you'd like to explain this,'

'I remember, Fido, winning isn't the only thing...there are also stud fees.'

'He's a very superior dog. Even his fleas have pedigrees!'

"The guy I bought him from says he's a pure sheepdog."

"They were bred originally to be hors d'oeuvres."

'My husband's just getting some ready to show you.'

Botox sharpei

'One thing, however - if they DO bite you, you don't suffer!'