Budget Flyer Gifts

"I'm afraid that you missed the $50 flight, it left in 1973."

"We'll now start boarding Group 9... Please remember your inferiority as you walk past the other groups, you cheap, dirty, cretins."

Budget Air - Click here if you agree to be being treated like dirt

'Luggage is luggage, sir -- just try to be happy with what you've got.'

'This ladies and gentlemen is our business model.'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

'The government's right. Not counting, food, clothing, energy, shelter, health care, or transportation, inflation is hardly going up.'

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

"I want you to know that emotion overrode reason."

'We're asking what america can do without to reduce the deficit...no, ma'ma! the Gop and Dems are not options!'

"I just..."

'Honestly Bob, it's not that bad. If you can make as much next year as you did this year you'll be able to pay off your outstanding taxes for last year. That'll just leave the interest, the tax for this year and... my fees.'

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

'He must be going economy!'

Santa knows he has to be more careful. One more accident due to pilot error, and the FAA would take away his pilot's license for good.

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

'One thing about being in the drivers seat -- you pay for the gas.'

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

"I know we said we would get you a laptop.. but this will have to do until business gets better."

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

"This is the last time I let you handle our vacation plans, you cheapskate."

'What if we televise government budget hearings and make them pay-per-view?'

Overdraft limit.

Well, the doctor confirmed that it's not Rosacea.

"Yow! Thank goodness you've kept costs on a short leash!"

'It took a six hour operation to remove this fiver from your fist.'

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."