Budget-savvy Flyer Gifts

"We've had budget cutbacks since your last session of flight simulation."

'Dad, may I use the plane tonight?'

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

'Sorry I'm late - I was stacked up at the airport.'

Dog on a plane.

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

Happy Pilot flying fast plane.

"Thank goodness they added more leg room."

Excess Baggage: People will do almost anything to avoid paying those fees for checked baggage.

"Attention: The Captain has turned off the hokey-pokey light. You are now free to shake it all about."

'This ladies and gentlemen is our business model.'

"The flights are 99p...but it's an extra £435.89 if you want to take them inside the plane!"

"The plane will cost $269 million per unit... a little less if we forego the cup holders."

"We'll now start boarding Group 9... Please remember your inferiority as you walk past the other groups, you cheap, dirty, cretins."

'Granted, the burros are a lot slower than chair lifts. But for a quarter the price of a regular lift ticket, I'm all for it.'

Budget Air - Click here if you agree to be being treated like dirt

'Luggage is luggage, sir -- just try to be happy with what you've got.'

"And then you stick out your thumb like this."

"Hey wow, you're right, Mr Branson! The crushing weight of my climate anxiety does feel a little lighter in zero G."

'You and your cheap flights!!'

'Was I wrong in thinking that diamonds are a girl's best friend?'

"No luggage."

'For transportation, you get a free pair of running shoes.'

'He must be going economy!'

Customer cuts cord of cash register as worker checks groceries.

"Isn't it great how everyone's saying how air travel leaves a big carbon footprint? Now I can stop being depressed and instead feel self righteous about never being able to afford an exotic vacation!"

Discount Overcrowded Airlines Co. That's not an escape slide --- It's a giant shoehorn. Departures.

'I flew first class once.. it was neat!'

"Did you remember to unplug the car?"

Relax, sir. As soon as we're sure the first class passengers have plenty of oxygen, you'll get yours.

Airport. Whoever said the journey is better than the destination must have never traveled over the holidays.

"Looks like the BBC cutbacks are starting to kick in."

Airport Security. Do you have anything in your pockets? No, I just bought an airline ticket.

Excess Baggage: Many hotels, inspired by the airlines, are gouging their guests by adding 'resort fees' to the room rates.

'Where is the cheapest place to get a beer?'