Budget Critiques Aficionado Gifts

Cost of the military.

George doesn't really like me using the credit card.

'Sorry guys... budget cuts !'

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

'My husband thought he could save money by repairing it himself.'

"Rumours of a crisis in the NHS are groundless...Spending is up by 2%, management ratios down by 62%..."

'The attack will have to wait until tomorrow Congressman. Today is furlough day. . .'

Budget Cuts

"We just can't justify the expense of cheese, let alone the upkeep of the maze."

Med. Soc Sec. Can we agree on anything to reduce the deficit other than a bake sale?

"Well, if there is life on Mars, how come they haven't asked us for money?"

"If only there was a thesaurus for numbers."

"We’ve been told to cut the drugs budget so in future Louella here will be chanting away your pain."

'I need $50.' - '$40? What do you need $30 for?'

"I understand Senator Quigley was really counting on that raise."

I used to live payday to payday, now I live payday to three days till payday.

"I know it's not an antique but it will be when I've finished paying for it."

'At $12 a glass, I want it to spit out what it drank.'

Your Pizza Dollar

"It was all we could afford in the end."

"Never go grocery shopping on an empty stomach. And never go shopping for shoes on a full credit card."

"Cuts, cuts! I said we need more cuts!"

"Have you noticed? They're making everything smaller at the grocery store...but they're keeping prices the same!"

Benefit mistakes cost £one billion a year... Well, in our defence we did get a lot of the numbers correct, they just weren't in the right order.

"And Boris caims all his spending plans will be financed by winnings on investing £1000 a week in Eurolottery tickets..."

Look thru the hole to see budget savings: 'I don't see anything in there...'

'There's no money to provide 'Care in the Community'...but we have just enough to move him into the carpark!'

'We have to make massive cuts so we can reduce debt.... which will cut into growth which is needed so we can make massive cuts...'

Road to nowhere, made possible by surplus highway funds.

'Due to cuts, the school will only be open 6 to 10 on Sunday night.'

To protect the ears of college admissions officers, parents are asked to step into a sound-proof booth before looking at tuition prices.

"You thought we would offer lower fares? How insensitive."

Coalition cuts: 'Hmm! Where to START?'

"Hey, I'm sorry...cutbacks, y'know!"

The Inaugural Ball