Budget Debate Enthusiast Gifts

'We have to make massive cuts so we can reduce debt.... which will cut into growth which is needed so we can make massive cuts...'

"Welfare cuts might be painful...but there's only so much we can afford!"

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

Tariff Wars

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

'What's the smallest budget you can manage on?' 'The most you can give me!'

'Sorry guys... budget cuts !'

'And this is my strategic money reserve.'

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

"Instead of raising the minimum wage, we should lower it to $4.00 an hour and create more jobs. Plus, low wages would encourage car pooling."

'My husband thought he could save money by repairing it himself.'

"I hate check writing, but, hey, it pays the bills."

Rare Medical Conditions - The compulsive desire to work out restaurant bills correctly

The ways and means committee reaches the tipping point.

'In a cost-saving move, I've replaced your cubicle with a back pack.'

US Deficit

'My pay envelope is empty.' - 'Your deductions equal your salary'

'I want to return this wallet. I can't seem to keep any money in it.'

"Post-holiday dieting will be much easier this year. Our disposable cash flow will be diverted."

'The attack will have to wait until tomorrow Congressman. Today is furlough day. . .'

"Strategic plan B: We chop down all the office plants and grow vegetables."

Bureau of Spending Decreases and Deficit Reduction - 'Wait a minute! How can that be?'

"Well, if there is life on Mars, how come they haven't asked us for money?"

You want my support for your reform bill, eh? — what's it worth to you?

'Well, you're bankrupt, but look on the bright side -- it only cost you eight dollars per transaction!'

Doctor to man: 'You'll need to empty your pockets. For symbolic purposes, let's start with your wallet.'

'I think we should budget on the number of budgets we draw up'

Piggy Bank reads 'How to Manage Your Money.'

"Well, if I can't get an increase based on merit, how about one based on the cost of living beyond my means?"

"Right now we're at a budget impasse. I maintain that you provide an essential service, and my wife feels that you do not."

'Our financial statement was delivered 'postage due'. Think that's a sign?'

Family Budgets

'Honestly, Boss, I only asked it how to make ends meet on the salary you pay me. . .'

'Any annuity we can afford wouldn't pay the MILK BILL!'