Budget-conscious Partner Gifts

"These are the principal qualities we're looking for in our new recruits."

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

"No, no - that's not the company sales, that's my marriage."

'Excuse me, sir. Could you spare $2000,000 to treat an uninsurable pre-existing condition?'

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

'This could be a very expensive operation — I'm going to refer you to the Federal Government.'

'Before we unload him, he'd like a written price support.'

"... And how are you enjoying the cheapest bottle of wine on the menu?"

"This is a third-year medical student. To cut costs, your insurance company dismissed the surgeon."

Husband dismayed to get cold mutton for dinner again. Wife comments that someone must be economical on the housekeeping money she is given.

Sam's Nation Building

"Wow, they want $10,000!"

'Open wide.' 'Your wallet.'

"Sergio, we don't have to spend so much money on health insurance."

'Private schools are really expensive these days - Why don't you home-school him?'

'Computer Prices' blowing away you money

'At these prices I won't be able to say much!'

Senior Brand Name Medicine Cabinet

'I'd like to stay and watch. It usually cuts the bill by 30%.'

"Natasha cuts diagnosis costs."

Has somebody taken the staff development and training budget again?"

'This is what telemedicine looks like for a small practice like ours.'

'The armed forces are having to respond to new kinds of threat.'

'I've asked Santa for a tank of unleaded petrol.'

"Get used to it...I think we're going to be eating them for a while yet..."

"We have our round cuts and these are our budget cuts."

'We only want small portions. I'm counting my calories and he's counting his pennies.'

"Our water bill is sky high. You've got to start taking shorter showers."

"Please tell me it's a local call..."

'I don't care if this security software was a bargain; it shouldn't reply with 'close enough' when I enter the wrong password.'

'Of course, for the compact budget we offer the Shelterette Programme.'

'Bring me a nice bottle of something that'll impress the lady, for under a fiver.'