Budget-conscious Learner Gifts

'It's the only way I can afford this place.'

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

"These are the principal qualities we're looking for in our new recruits."

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

"No one can afford to eat us anymore."

'Before we unload him, he'd like a written price support.'

Husband dismayed to get cold mutton for dinner again. Wife comments that someone must be economical on the housekeeping money she is given.

"... And how are you enjoying the cheapest bottle of wine on the menu?"

"This is a third-year medical student. To cut costs, your insurance company dismissed the surgeon."

Take one Per Day as Affordable.

Low income vampires.

"Wow, they want $10,000!"

Sam's Nation Building

Affordable housing

"Natasha cuts diagnosis costs."

Back to school expenses.

'I'd like to stay and watch. It usually cuts the bill by 30%.'

Senior Brand Name Medicine Cabinet

'Private schools are really expensive these days - Why don't you home-school him?'

'Computer Prices' blowing away you money

"Get used to it...I think we're going to be eating them for a while yet..."

One upside-down tomato planter. I can't wait for juicy, free tomatoes. It's $23.37 with tax. Not bad for homegrown tomahtas. Plus $8 for potting soil, $15 for the hanger, $11 for organic fertilizer, $16 � Hey! � Where are you going? To the "Pick and Save" market.

"We have our round cuts and these are our budget cuts."

"Even though it's an honorary degree, we have to bill you for 4 years of tuition."

'The armed forces are having to respond to new kinds of threat.'

'I can tell when we're in a recession - my allowance gets cut.'

It's been hard to find silver linings in this situation but I was able to buy this boat when my daughter had to switch from a huge to a tiny wedding.

'I don't care if this security software was a bargain; it shouldn't reply with 'close enough' when I enter the wrong password.'

'The good news is these grades are not good enough for me to get into an expensive college.'

'Of course, for the compact budget we offer the Shelterette Programme.'

'Bring me a nice bottle of something that'll impress the lady, for under a fiver.'

'I'm on a fixed income, so these free offers are most welcome.'

'YOU look at the size...and I'LL look at the price!'

Vulture oil inc.