Budget-conscious Golfer Pillows

Green Fee $55. How much if we didn't use the green?

'Wow! This is an expensive golf course...a free drop costs ten bucks!'

GAS PRICES AT PUMP

Golf lessons

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

Golfer wears 'How's my driving?' t-shirt.

'I don't care if you do need practice hitting out of the sand. The cat needs her litter box!'

Underwater on the Car

The Uncle Vinnie Insomnia Open

'I wonder why my master never makes it into the Master's Tournament?'

'Don't move.'

Club House. An eighty dollar green fee! -- I haven't even teed-off yet and I'm already in the hole!

Man in artic weather playing sport with snow balls

Old man plays golf, supported by his caddy and paramedic.

"Apparently, the golf clothes and expensive golf clubs didn't help you play better."

"Duh!"

Al's Kwiki-Fix Garage. Why is it that when you guys "run over the estimate", you're never backing up? (Published previously on 1/24/2000.)

"A preliminary census report indicates that for the first time in our nation's history female anthropologists out-number male professional golfers."

"He,he!. . . Some guy on the ninth hole is going crazy looking for this!"

'It says take all your medication,if you can afford it.'

Rory McIlroy

'You never see one that says save some income.'

Brian McMahon's hobby? Being hit by as many pro golfers as possible.

Luckily I hit the pin!

'I asked my doc for a diet plan and it works great - thanks to his usurious bills, I can't afford a car or taxis and that's why I'm losing weight by walking!'

TOLD YOU TO TAKE LESSONS FROM GOLF PRO

'Tell me the truth,Rodney - you've moved the hole haven't you!'

"The swim team is really feeling those school budget cuts."

Slippery hand golfer

"Our water bill is sky high. You've got to start taking shorter showers."

"I hate playing with pros!"

Women Golfers

"Jack, can you earn a living with your golf... starting tomorrow?"

"No, Dad, I'm not practicing to be a golfer when I grow up! I'm practicing to be a doctor!"

Addressing The Ball