Budget Battle Veteran Gifts

"The cuts have made things even worse...It's the worst part of the job. Having to spend so much time with people at the very end of the tether...people with no hope, no optimism for the future, people in a state of despair!"

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'You earned this corner office by cutting corners...'

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

"Everything's gone up."

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

'As part of our alternative budget management strategy we've got Tim on 'Hail Marys' in here and Geoff sacrificing a goat to Woden next door!'

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

'I need affordable daycare now!'

'If only you could do this with a cow once in a week, we'd save a lot of money for the food delivery service, Rupert!'

'If the universe and everything in it is expanding, how come our budget gets shrunk all the time?'

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'

"Give it to me straight, doc. Will I outlive social security and medicare?"

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

'I said we've got to lift up our numbers! I did not say to turn a loss of 150.000,- into a loss of 280.000,-!!'

"Sorry, I'm late. I didn't realize how much credit you had on your card."

'Yes, I think you better had ask Santa for it. Because there's no way I could afford to buy it.'

'The hospital needs to cut its drug budget...Mrs Miggins will be seeing what she can do for the Oncology department with hot twigs and frogspawn...'

"I'm not sure if that bill is correct or not, sir. We just throw a bunch of charges on there to see which ones stick."

'The operation we want you to do is to remove 25 from our budgets.'

Student Debt

Little Taxes.

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

"Yes dear. But, I don't think you're actually supposed to dispose of your disposable income."

'There's not much of an incentive after taxes.'

Budget cuts were beginning to bite at the local council

'I know the marketing budget is stretched...but I still think we need professional models!'

"Sometimes I get the crazy feeling that he blames us for the budget overrun."

'Of course, that bid's just an estimate.'

Principal with 'budget cuts' in-tray and 'creative solutions' out-tray.

'On my salary, microeconomics is all I can afford.'

"This is your social worker Mrs Bigworth, she's brought your care package."

'Remember, Henderson - A penny saved is a departmental oversight.'

'Am I an additional cost or an incidental expense?'