Brother With A Sense Of Humor Gifts

Conversation in the country about theft

The Wellington Statue.

Um, General Hannibal, a word if I may...

At the mobile tracking test lab.

'Projectile painting.'

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

PET THEORIES

Camel rider sees sign stating: The Next Mirage 16 miles.

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

"And for dessert, I'd like the mice pudding."

'Wait! Let's see if he gets up on his own.'

'As a matter of fact, I have the heart of a 30-year-old woman.'

No caption. (The Mona Lisa is depicted wearing a smiley face button.)

'We all shrink as we get older... You'll just have to be a little patient!'

C'mon boy, speak! Speak!

How Am I Driving?

"Not me, brother - you wake him!"

'I'm all about quantity.'

President Trump blames loss of gravity on Democrats and China."

Sick Exhibitionist

Most egregious misuse of Commons speaking time.

'Watch out for my little brother -- he's clothing-optional.'

'Mom says she has a souffle in the oven - Does that mean I'm going to have a baby brother?'

Log-in name and password?

'Hey, don't look at me -- I was AGAINST free will.'

"Where do you want me to put my baggage?"

101 uses of a dead cat: ladder.

"Hey kids! - look what I found at the local animal shelter!"

Trump's thoughts on 9/11

'Here's the deal: I can't dig right now and can't trust other dogs... So, there's a carrot for you each time you dig out one of my bones...'

"Do you ever just stop and think about all the disgusting things there are to put in your mouth?"

'Please leave your message after the tone...'

"My sister takes a bath every day - she's a mud wrestler."

Cats. Not the play.

'Sorry, but Mum made me bring my dopey sister along.'