Broadcast Television Buffs Gifts

'He likes closed caption. He's deaf.'

Television Readers.

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

Cord cutter

'Thank heavens! For a minute there I thought it was the news!'

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

We saw this episode of Grey's Anatony, I recognize the symptoms.

Man: 'How cute. He must like the movement.' Cat: 'There are some challenging themes here but little or no dramatic resonance.'

'Now for today's numbers...'Bad Dogs' outnumbered 'Good Dogs' by two-to-one...'

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

E-vac-u-ate! E-vac-u-ate! . . . I've just farted. . ."

7 Dwarves of Retirement

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"Bill did the voice-over for this commercial."

Mary Tyler Moore: Spot the Difference

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

'Can't you at least wait until half time?!'

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

Homo Zapiens

Tunnel of TV

"Where do you remember last seeing your glasses?"

"Can't we have 'PRESS BUTTON' to shut up the commentator's gobbledegook."

"If I were you, I wouldn't change the channel!"

Woman and TV.

'It's funny really - when your father's home he hardly ever says a word!'

"We subscribe to five streaming services so why are we never able to see the hot new show everybody is raving about?"

"... And in Canada today ... nothing happened."

"BBC One’s Casualty has reached its 1000th episode. The long-running hospital drama is apparently very popular with viewers... But even more popular among jobbing actors."

As you can see, media coverage at this event is very heavy...

'You should know better than to switch channels during a Garfield special.'

'Have you any idea just how little this is worth?'

'What TV show do frog princes go on ...?...'