Breathing Exercises Gifts

"Let's begin with a deep, slow, cleansing breath, through the nose, to a count of 1-2-3-4."

Anger Management: Breathe in and Breathe out.

Respiratory Therapy Convention. I come here to hear the various opinions have. Ah, for the breath-taking views!

Yoga studio: In 234 and Out 234.

The real reason we have natural disasters...

"Did the doctor forget to tell you to exhale?"

"Breathe, just breathe, and repeat to yourself, 'Why can't I do this while watching Netflix?'"

Good and bad air

"You're right. Yoga sure sounds easy!"

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

Exercise Class

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

"Well! I'm glad to hear you're finally using that tread mill!"

Keep Fit.

Holiday Aerobics.

Man to woman leaving health club: 'The instructor said I had lots of body definition ... plump, rotund, obese, heavy ...'

The summer of her 39th year, Eleanor could be found most evenings on a hill (known locally as Robert's Hump) doing aerobics of her own devising.

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

'And one and two and let change through and three and four and collapse on the floor.'

'Hey, we have one of those. You hang your laundry on it.'

"Ever since the elevator broke down, we've learned that our staff is in desperate need of a fitness program. Especially, since we're only one floor up."

Advanced aerobicizers wait till after class to aid the fallen.

Yoga Beginners Class. Breathe and stretch. That's Good. URGH! OOOF! "Yoga pants" should be something you wear and not something that happens because you can't catch your breath!

There's a popular new health spa down there. The endorphins are having a blast in aerobics. Antibodies are learning kickboxing and the adrenaline is getting some much needed relaxation in the yoga studio. The only problem is the water molecules. Everybody is concerned about them! What's wrong? They haven't been seen since they went into the sauna!

Aerobics Class.

'Apparently, you've purchased another piece of exercise equipment. I think it's time I organised an intervention.'

The Good Breathing Guide

'...27...28...29...by golly, you're right, this is good aerobic exercise!'

"Professor Williams had at first been reluctant to join the Assistant Deans in their Think Great Thoughts aerobics. He later came to enjoy the activity."

AEROBICS CLASS, 'What is your body telling you now?', 'To be honest, I'm getting mixed signals.'

Gym: Back and Forth or Going Nowhere.

Step aerobics

"Breathe in...now breathe out. Excellent! Just remember to keep doing that for the next few years and you'll be fine."