Breakup Navigator Gifts

"It's not you, it's. . . oh, who am I kidding? Yes, it's you."

"What I like best about you is how you, er ...the way you, ummm....You know, there's actually nothing I like about you."

In the Guru District

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"We'll always have couples therapy."

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

"No, I really DO love you. It's just that my committee has some issues."

Couples' therapy

'Great Therapy!'

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"Of course I won't forget to tell you when quarantine's over!"

"There's something I have to tell you."

"Do we go out or do we stay home and open a can of worms?"

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

"If I ever start turning into my father do me a favor and don't turn into my mother."

"When we first started seeing each other, we would always use the same word for snow."

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

Okay, I'll admit I was wrong. But I won't say what I was wrong about.

Can we talk about our attorney-client relationship?

'When I said I would move mountains for you, it was just a figure of speech!'

"I suppose we should start with listening skills!"

'I was dumped by my girlfriend.'

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

Harvey went to the kitchen to top up his gin and tonic. When he came back, things took an unexpected turn.

"She said 'let's go for a walk in the park'. It turned into a quagmire."

"No, I don't still think about him - I'm with YOU now."