Breakup Gifts

'You're afraid of commitment, aren't you?'

Terrible at Goodbyes

"So that's your final answer."

'It's not you, it's your carbon footprint.'

The Emergence Of Language

"Brad, we've got to talk."

'I'm sorry Adam, but you're ugly... I mean we all are, but especially you.'

'This is goodbye, Fred, but of course, I'll never forget you.'

'Kim, you can't leave me!!'

"It's not you, Frank, it's me - I don't like you."

'It has nothing to do with you, Bessie. It's just that I'm lactose intolerant.'

'It's not us, Louis. It's our medications that don't interact well together.'

"And may all your chakras be blocked!"

"Good-bye! You will always be a part of me!"

"I want out, Laura."

"If you really want to know why I'm dumping you, you may want to check out my website where there's a long detailed explanation posted."

"I got over DDT, and I'll get over you!"

"I thought we were soul mates, too, so imagine my surprise to find that my actual soul mate is Nicole in accounting."

Tunnel of Love exit.

"O.K., leave me, but just remember, if you do I'm coming with you."

"I hope we can still be cousins."

Rioters carrying sign reading 'Actually, it's more complicated than that'.

"It's not jsut that he walks upright and uses complex tools. He also makes me laugh."

"True, you have irreconcilable differences, but they're mainly about flossing."

"This isn't working. We have nothing in common."

"I never meant to hurt you."

Blues artis's daily list

'They say that breaking up is hard to do, so I brought along a grief counselor.'

'I'm leaving, Ed. I cannot endure another minute of our sick, co-dependent farce of a marriage...'

'I'm leaving you because you know the price of everything and the value of nothing.'

She left Friday. He noticed Tuesday, when all the clean towels ran out.

"Goodbye, Kevin. I could look the other way with the boozing and the skirt-chasing, but I did not sign up for bicycle clothes."

"...He broke your heart, did he? Well, I can't say I didn't see this coming!"

"So she left you. Maybe it wasn't your fault. Sometimes circumstances are beyond your lack of self-control."

"She's upstairs, washing you right out of her hair"