Brainy Crumpet Lover Gifts

Thinking man's crumpet.

"Is it that bad?"

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

When Love In The Laboratory Turns Sour.

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

"Tia Carmen, did you ever wish summer was over...so you could be in school?"

"My therapist plays with my brain."

'You and Phil make a great couple. You're perfect for each other!'

A Brain Drain

'The Orginial Big Band sound'

Turning off the thinking lightbulb at home time.

"I'm getting subtle hints of chlorophyll."

'Yep. I used to use chemical to strip wallpaper, but the cats are more efficient, and there's no nasty smell.'

'You only love me because you haven't got a boyfriend!'

"So you're saying if I wasn't so smart, I'd have more friends?"

Frankie and Johnny were lovers...

Arturo Sandoval

Brain Exercise Video: "Okay, think...and stop...and think, and stop! Stay with me now! Think harder! Feel that burn!"

MAH MOO MAH MAH MOO MOO MOO MOO MAH MOOMAH MOO MAH MAH MOOMAH MOO MOO!

Brain versus Religion.

'OK, Mr. Altruism, real fast, name three selling points of loyalty that don't involve food.'

"You know very well you're not supposed to beg at the table."

"Your computer is fine. It's your brain that has a lot of useless programs on it. Unfortunately, it doesn't come with an uninstall button."

Cat lights rocket strapped to a dog

"Ahhh, the Cubans know the kind of treats to leave out for Santa on a cold winter's night."

A patient plays the trumpet while in therapy.

'Honestly, dear, brains again?'

"But a deep sense of grievance and indignation IS my Happy Place."

Annual Amnesia Convention

You realize you had ten pints last night? That's the last time I drink rum during the week!

Don't you Guantanamera me young lady!

Einstein.

'You're right - he's trying to communicate.'

Louis Armstrong

"There she is...Melinda Alvarez...the smartest girl in the third grade."