Boxing Ring Master Gifts

He's slow and can't see out of one eye, but watch out for his left hook.

'Try to stay away from the referee's left jab!'

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

"Hey, just wanted to say bye again, guys, I'm off to join the circus."

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

I just trained with my two sparring partners over there. A "boxed set"!

Opening night at the circus: "How's everyone's jitters?"

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

Circus

'I can't believe this.. biggest fight of my life, and I forget to pack a wallop.'

"Keep it up. His knuckles are getting really sore"

"Keep your guard up and don't hold your punches. Whatever you do, watch out for his right hook!"

"What do you mean, you 'feel funny'?"

"You must forgive me, I seem to have misplaced my spectacles... Does the best man have the ring?"

'That was a peach of a right hander the referee gave you!'

'Do you still think we have this family under control?'

'The actors guild suspended my membership.'

'Nah, the circus ain't what it used to be. It's got all fancy and hard since Circ de Something started.'

"Smite him, my son!"

'Don't forget the plan - When he gets weak from laughing - Hit him with your left!'

'He's a control freak but the treats are good.'

"I wanna be a clown when I grow up."

'What did I tell you about getting caught on the ropes?'

"My therapist said next time he tries to put his head in my mouth I've to politely refuse"

A dog lights a cigarette, blows 3 smoke rings, then jumps through them, as if through hoops.

"Try a new tactic, punch back."

Boxing Trainer: 'And watch out for this fella. He has a huge Left Hook.'

"Sorry I'm late, I've brought cappuccinos for everyone."

Tired mom: I thought labour ended when leaving the hospital.

Matador.

'Soon as your endorphins kick in, you'll feel great.'

"You hit the ball- that's ping. Your opponent hits the ball- that's pong!"

"This is the part I hate most - he's got terrible bad breath!"

'I just want to be taken seriously as an artist.'

'So that's where I left my car keys!'