Bowman Humorist Gifts

'I told you a blowgun was a bad idea!'

These species are only living off the coast of Southern California!

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

'Flight simulator'

'Screen saver. . . or did his computer freeze again?'

'George, you're supposed to be tasting the wine, not seeing what effect it has.'

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

'No, I can't remember the name of the wine, but it did come in a bottle about this tall, if that's any help.'

'I don't actually want to learn so much that I become a wine buff - just a wine snob!'

'Beware of SUV.'

Dear Sadie, I'm just an aging Baby-Boomer who still believes in America, and sees all the good around me, but I don't understand why we've become so mean. How can I feel good about us again? Signed, Marlemarion. Great question. There's an easy answer as to how you can feel better about the world. Change your name to something normal! I just don't agree with the @#$% premise that we've gotten mean.

'I say, it would be ever so nice if you could hand me my rubber ducky'.

High tide.

'I've got to wake up extra early tomorrow morning. Any clue how to set this thing?'

'Collar-optional resorts.'

If a motorist came bursting through the doors...would he be up for damages?

'I feel better today too, but around here I've learned not to be too optimistic.'

'If I were you, I'd leave the keys in the ignition and hope someone steals it.'

'For a little extra we can allocate you a seat inside the aircraft.'

"Nope, no need to smell the cork."

Airport security - next step?

Many clowns in rowboat

Australian Sat Nav - 'Straight on mate'.

"Do you have a wine that tastes like beer?"

'I see you've dressed to go clubbing.'

'I noticed your wine list only has reds and whites. Don't you have any yellow wines?'

"Would sir like to try the wine. . . ?"

'Why can't you ride under the dash like other airbags?'

"It's disappointing, but if that's the biggest you've got ..."

'Please come down, Reverend Brewster -- We really DID like your sermon!'

"Excuse me....water!!"

'Our house is directly in the migratory path of Canada geese, so we keep the windows open until mid-November.'

Early Selfies

Driver with a rear view mirror attached to his forehead.