Borderline Shopper Gifts

Malpractice Lawyers Without Borders.

'She's so put together!'

"I think I've found the most comfy jeans."

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

Jungle Stores.

Unfinished Funiture Store.

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"Perhaps a cozy scarf to go with the hat?"

"Okay, lets see what we have here."

Unusual Offers

Shampoo and Salad Dressing.

'She's on the trail of a pair of Jimmy Choo's.'

Expensive greeting cards.

'Please enter your pin now.'

'Triple-headed razors?... Aisle seven.'

"Hibernation - here I come..!"

Fresh picked baseballs.

'I went to see a personal shopper this afternoon. . . I thought I'd surprise you!'

Jumble Sale

"Does it come with magnets?"

'Do you have any relaxed fit jeans that aren't quite so relaxed?'

(Direct to the Consumer)

'I'm home, Honey! Come see what I picked up at the Farmers Market!'

It bag and no knickers!

"I'm sorry, your grapefruit subscription ran out and I forgot to renew it."

'Gee, these are great, are they dishwasher proof?'

'Can we move the beef jerky a smidge and display our organic cleanser?'