Bookshelf Breaker Gifts

"I was quite a successful writer once...what sort of books are you interested in?"

'Let's not go by the book.'

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

'No swimming. No breathing.'

'Congratulations on breaking through the glass ceiling of the company downstairs. However, I will be sending you a repair bill.'

Woman's Support Group: No Bra, No Griddle, No Service.

Yet another law of the jungle: 'Absolutely NO howling at the moon after 11 PM!

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

Walk or don't. You're a grown man. Make your own decisions.

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

'I shoulda told you guys. . . Marmaduke makes up his own rules as we go along.'

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

To attract a bigger audience, the world chess federation allow fans to distract an opponent when it's his move.

'Don't be so dramatic and get into my office!'

"Worst breach of corporate dress code I've ever witnessed."

"What we're looking for is someone who think outside the box?"

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

'Hey, hey, hey!'

'Read that last part back to me.'

'Rules are there to be broken, my friend.'

'You haven't heard the best thing. . .no referees.'

Rejuvenile Delinquents.

I love Basketball.

'I hate having to go outside for a cigarette!'

'Isn't that a little extreme? - Cloning yourself just so you can use the carpool lane?'

'Oi mate! No hoods in the shopping mall.'

Pole Vault Rules

"Stop with this mathematics dictatorship."

"Poop outside and he saves it in a bag. Crap on the carpet and he loses his mind."

"On a show of hands, do we let Miss Brimshaw into our den."

'No Mis Evans. You know only substitute teachers are allowed to carry taser guns!'

It's from the homeowners association --- They want me to stop leaving my worries on the doorstep.

Henrietta was never one to conform to society's labels. She preferred to think of herself as an 'off-Rhode lsland Red'...

'I'm sure it's a violation, but I can't find it in the rule book.'