Bookish Fish Fan Gifts

'I'm telling you Bill: I can hear a scratching sound...'

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

Garden Gnome fishing all the fish for pond.

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

"We’re a lending aquarium."

Goldfish bowl on raft...

Fish snorkling above water.

"... Oh, don't worry, I won't 'overcook it'... I hope you like, sushi."

A Preschool of Fish

Kids with Fish Balloons

Message in a bottle being read by a fish

'Son, I told you before: If you circle your prey for too long, you get dizzy...'

'I'll never let my love of fishing come between us.'

Big Fish Packing Co - Our Flounder.

"I'd love to help out but I'm barely keeping my head below water now."

"The boys at Jack's Bait & Tackle will never believe this one!"

'I take it that the birthday cake is for this old trout you just served me?'

Annual Swim Hundreds of Miles, Spawn and Die Marathon.

'Guess who netted it.'

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

"Oceans are rising, landmass is shrinking - so far so good."

'It's a common misconception, but it's always been three fishes.'

'How do you stop a fish from smelling?'

Cat to fisherman about his caught fish: 'Let me clean them.'

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

Fish flipping flapjack in pan. Title: 'Ed was glad he'd caught a panfish.'

'It's not as impressive as it looks. He only watches fishing shows.'

"I wish someone would come and turn the vibrating buzzer off on that mobile phone!"

"If I survive this holiday, I'm moving to a pond."

Carp, per diem.

"Congratulations on becoming a mom! Wow, he has such a big..."

'My horoscope said I was going to make someone happy today.'