Book Reviewer Gifts

Book publishing.

Dog writes a review: 'A sublime book, I devoured it in one sitting ...'

Newspaper editor says to woman: 'Agnes, you review children's picture books �' please stop saying 'I read it in one sitting.''

"It's so-so."

"It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing, and No.1 on the best-seller list."

Unsolved Mysteries

"Rate this book: 3 stars out of 5."

"Heads up! It's another tidal wave of overwrought critical hyperbole!"

'Umm, well, thank you Mr. Snuggles for that unorthodox report on 'To kill a mockingbird'.'

At a publishing company - waste paper bin labeled as out with overflowing inbox dropping into it

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

Can't Touch This

"I like his earlier work better, particularly the ones I said I didn't like at the time."

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

"Moby Richard by Herman Melville" "Wonderful! Not sure about the title—let's discuss editor."

'Right so lets be clear, when you said my book was a turgid reworking of a sad collection of hackneyed ideas you actually meant that it was a groundbreaking work of originality and genius...'

"Be careful of that sun, Stewart. You're starting to look like the front page of the 'Times Book Review.'"

Learn to Be a Critic In The Privacy Of Your Own Home With The Apex Correspondence School Of Criticism!

"It's a great story, funny and entertaining - and better still it's not won a single prize for literature."

No, no, Grok, we love your creative voice! Ort is just here to do a little punch-up.

'Mummy, the review of this book was more interesting.'

The Music Critic.

Reviewing a Scientific Paper - Etiquette for References.

"I feel bad about Nora Ephron's neck."

"How was the play!"

"You're right, Pierre, they are licking their plates."

"Failure is definitely the best teacher, but I'm thinking auditing a class with Success might not hurt."

"Writing that book was a real strain."

"Uncle Tod's Reviews"

"What I really want to do is chew up children’s books."

"You call that a suit?"

"What did I think about the play? About an hour too long!"