Book Report Artist Gifts

'I wasn't able to write a report on the book you assigned. I couldn't find the video anywhere.'

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

My book report is based on the audio book of the same name.

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

"So start throwing together about 10 novels a week and bring them in on Wednesdays."

Charities should investigate whether published reports are 'Misleadingly Positive'.

'Your proposal is written with clarity and conviction. Send it up to legal for obfuscation.'

No animals were harmed during the writing of this book report....

'I'm doing a school report on 'the aging process,' Dad -- can I interview you?'

'Can I hand in my report tomorrow. Ms. D'Amato? I haven't finished reading the book. I've been too busy coloring it.'

Parent Involvement Tip #1

'I figured if 1 is good for milk, why not schoolwork, too?'

'This is gobbledygook. I asked for mumbo-jumbo.'

"Getting good grades isn't enough, son. You also need to bring in new clients."

"It was only when I started to write the story of my life that I realised I'd forgotten to have one."

"What? You were expecting good news? Expectations are so-o-o-o passe."

The Curious George pop-down book

Egyptology Books form Pyramid

'I'll give you this, Hargrove - Your report was a perfect blend of cliches, banalities and platitudes.'

"I'm doing just fine ??" as long as no one decides to do a background check."

'I would have had these reports done sooner, but someone rolled a ball with a bell inside it into my cubicle.'

"I can never seem to get my report in on time!"

Good report, Morton, work on it a little more until it sounds like one of mine.

'How long have you had that toupee?'

"When I hear the word mathematics I immediately think of three things. Boring and useless."

"...there's not a single shareholder...who will be able to understand any part of it!"

Keep working or you will be fired.

Multitasking

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this damn committee.'

'It says here that machine learning finds fake news with 88% accuracy. I think from now on I really need to edit my reports before I turn them in.'

Boss hands over document: 'There are too many abbreviations in your report ? can you rewrite it asap?'

Kid reading report: 'My book report is on 'TV Guide'...'

Cover Design for Beardsley's 'Book of Fifty Drawings'

'Please return my book report after you grade my work. I like to retain all the rights to my intellectual property.'

"Deidre's right. 'Challenging current dynamics' sounds better than SNAFU."