Body Confidence Enthusiast Pillows

"I figured I'd start with one love handle and if you liked it, go for the pair."

"I was young and cocky because I wasn't aware of my shortcomings. Now I'm old and cocky because I can't remember what they are."

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

"Privates Beach"

Breast Height Chart

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

"I don't care what it was or how hard it was to kill. It makes me look fat."

Victoria's secret lovers: Barry, Al, Percy.

'There was no more putting it off; breast reduction time.'

'I've added a few minutes to that hour glass figure I had in school.'

'You know that thin person inside you, struggling to get out? -- He seems to have gained weight, too.'

"Hey, great ab!"

'If you want them balanced, it'll be an extra 250 dollars.'

'No luggage.'

"I maybe a little overweight, I'm wearing make up today."

"So does this Flamingo diet have any side effects?"

'I seem to have lost the body I had before I had children.'

"Great. Now I have to worry about my weight."

"If only legginess were based on circumference."

"Feeling like a skinny person living in a fat person's body is actually quite normal."

My birthday suit is out of fashion.

I heart my bum.

The abominable snow-woman

'Does my bum bag look big in this'

"I need to get back in the gym."

Out of condition man in front of mirror which makes him look slim.

"If anyone wants me I'll be on the shop floor strutting my stuff."

"I'm the double of Kate Moss, she's 8 stone, I'm 16."

"People don't agree on PRECISELY the right language but it's generally agreed that 'humongous lardy fat lump' is probably overstepping the mark."

"I seriously doubt people will notice your hairy back."

'I'm impressed by your self-confidence. What other skills do you have?'

'That's what I like about the Big Guy - he's usually wrong, but he's never in doubt.'

'By the way dear - how's your diet going?'

"I'm back in my thin pants again."

'What are they all staring at - have I got two heads or something?'