Boarding School Alumni Gifts

Boy home from boarding school

"I suppose it's too young for boarding school?"

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

'Quick, do a background search and see if this doctor passed his boards!'

'Wilkins! Keep your eyes on your own cadaver!'

"If nothing else, school has prepared me for a lifetime of backpacking."

'I've a horrible feeling I've left one of the implements inside the patient, Chang.'

Medical students learning how to perform a prostate examination.

"Sick? You're not sick! The money I owe on my student loans... now that's sick!"

Show Jumping Tantrums

'I've been sentenced to five weeks while they go on holidays... What about you guys?'

'Mom, I think it's time I graduated to a full size horse.'

Anatomy & Physiology Exam: The ... bone's connected to ... bone...

"Over here, by the whatchanacalalit...somebody get the anatomy book."

"Have you notices how Ed has changed since he started going to law school?"

'Notice how I stare at the forms like I'm actually reading them... and generally moving very slowly so I'm a little further behind schedule as the day progresses.'

'Where did you say the new anaesthetist trained?'

"It does seem like a school-approved activity."

'If you're so easily grossed out, why did you go to medical school?'

'What wine goes with the Hippocratic Oath- my nephew graduated from medical school.'

'Actually, you're my second patient if you count that cadaver in med school.'

"This semester I'm taking litigation avoidance. How about you?"

'He earned his way through medical school working in a pizzeria!'

"It was a surprise. The college alumni solicitation letters never stop, even here!"

"Ogden, could you pull a string and get me one of those pictures of you naked at Yale?"

'Now that we've boarded our first class, priority, gold priority, business class, premium and gold star passengers - is there anyone else left?'

"Guess who got into Hotchkiss!"

"I could have gone to Eton but I never had the Sat Nav."

'I thought they told you that any donation, no matter how small, would be greatly appreciated.'

'No, that's my photo above the caption: 'Student most likely to succeed'.'

"You just graduated from the best, most fun school ever! Nice!"

"Well, of course mommy and daddy are also said it's back to school time."

'It so happens, I think of myself as a CEO first, then as a human being.'