Blue-day Buddy Pillows

"For some reason I just feel a little 'blue' today!"

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

"Congratulations, Amruk. You prove they do exist."

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

Bike Rides

"I'm not napping yet, but I am getting ready to with a pre-nap warm up."

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

"So, Danny Boy, what's up in your world?"

"This is nice. You have your knitting and I have my vodka."

"Where do you see yourself in five pints time?"

'A bed just isn't the same without a person in it.'

"Some day, we should bait our hooks."

"Whoa. Check it out, Doug. Your ex-wife is sitting right below us with that dolt she ran off with..."

"Every single day, guys ask you for advice about women, work, sports... Haven't you ever even heard of the law of supply and demand?. . .I'd be glad to steer the downtrodden and the forlorn your way for a mere 82% of the man-to-man-talk fee."

'I don't mind him sleeping on our bed but why must he wear MY pyjamas?'

"Jim, just put that hole behind you."

"All yours, Buddy. I'm ALREADY living on house money."

"When it takes longer to wash your face, you're getting bald."

"Nobody loves me." "Yeah, nobody listens to me. Not even my wife." "My kids don't respect me."

'I guess the transplant went ok - I just got a love letter from my new liver!'

Signs you may be friends with a sheep....

Old School Mustaches

'This plumber you recommended...mate of yours, is he?'

"The depth of your wrongness is so deep that it is unknowable."

Little guy using telescope to see past a big guy blocking his view in the crowd,

This here's my kitty! I call er Whiskers!

Flower power.

Contrary to popular belief... pigs are very clean animals!

"Hey Cruz, check out my super-powered speaker system!"

"Okay, which one of you guys filled my bowling ball with helium?"

"I don’t know, Phil … my gut tells me she’ll drive you nuts."