Birth Story Entertainer Gifts

"I had the strangest dream. I was suddenly in a room full of people, and I didn't have a stitch on."

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

A Guide to Balloon Animals

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

'He does.'

'So one day I thought, I'll teach you brats to laugh at me!'

Any idea how long your family might be visiting?

"This should send the midwife off in a frenzy."

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

Baxter Higgleton, word balloon artist.

A family trying to make a child smile for a photo

"Kid gloves, Hernandez. You gotta use kid gloves!"

Clown Wife

'Oh, look - a juggling stilt-walker painting that little child's face!'

'Send in the Clones.'

"What's your occupation?"

Fur Baby

"This one is perfect for Thanksgiving. It comes prestained in cranberry sauce, gravy and pumpkin pie."

'Hurry up you guys! I'm about to serve dinner!'

Children's Entertainer

"I keep having these funny moods, doctor."

He'd attended Julliard and done Shakespeare in the park, and he never thought he'd sink this low, but there were bills to pay, and there weren't that many jobs out there for a bottle of seltzer water.'

'I'm not a magician, but I do keep live doves in my pants.'

Dog Birthdays

Clown walks balloon dog

Guy on stilts watching a balloon dog lift its leg on his stilts. Balloon animal maker watching on.

Crazy old clown cat lady.

"Don't worry, darling! I've set something up so the kids don't get bored on the trip."

'...Just because you hired me doesn't mean I have to entertain.'

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

'I'm not sure if he plays that loud because he has a good set of lungs or if it's a mean streak in him.'

The Amazing Mr Sausage

“What if I tell you the card you are thinking of is … the Jack of Hearts ?”