Bike Path Sage Gifts

"Why don't you get off the road and use the bike lane?"

The Fast Lane.

"For the last time, I’m not Bigfoot — I’m Larry from Vermont!"

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

"How can anyone remember Cheech and not remember Chong?"

Wherever You Go, There You Are - Next Exit.

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

Just think of meditation as "mental floss." (Published previously on 3/17/2006.)

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'

'Your Dad'll give your bike back when he realises he won't qualify for 2012.'

You ever wonder what would've happened if Nintendo had never existed? There'd have been no Mario Bros., and since Sega created Sonic to compete, there'd be no Sonic. And without those, the market wouldn't have been big enough to interest Sony. So … no Playstation. And no Playstation, no Xbox. Several generations of awkward teens would've had to come up with other excuses not to go outside. Sometimes I wonder if it rained where I grew up.

"Someday this is gonna be a sick bike path."

'That's not whitewash....that's detergent!'

'This is where it gets tricky. I see 3 alternate endings and a director's cut.'

The subway-delay prophet of doom

If Kitschy Film Dialogues Were Really Realistic. . .

Heavenwood

The Senior Citizen Surfer

"A door can never have too many hinges."

"I sweared to avoid someone who was reading a cycling facilities leaflet"

Thoughts in Traffic

"...specialist subject: London transport"

"Sorry about that - just clearing my throat."

Did you see Doctor Strange, little buddy? Yes sir!!! I reported to the nearest 3-D theater as mandated by the unspoken Comic Fan Compact of 2008 … wherein we all tacitly agreed that these are not individual movies, they are one big story and to miss even one part of it is sacrilege. I even watch all the Marvel Netflix shows, pursuant to the Daredevil Addendum of 2015, sir!!! So noted.

Moses Parting the Half-Pipe

'Stop! Listen to me! Size matters!!'

"Finally, a world where everyone wants to serve me."

Cyclists mistake.

"You just couldn't shut up could you?"

When Daisy died, you said she'd gone to a better place!

Your old battery doesn't recharge like it used to. I know just how it feels.

My flight back into town was kind of scary. It was so foggy, I couldn�t see the wingtips. Next time, wear penny loafers. They shiny pennies make them easier to see than wing tips.

"Show us again that crazy way you fold a newspaper to read on the subway!"

5K Run. How'd the 5K go, Frank? I only made it to the "G."

Road Rage Towards Cyclist