Bidding Fanatic Gifts

This isn't a good time to see him --- He just got outbid for a soul on eBay. Beelzebub.

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

'This is where we go to get away from it all. . . except for Stanley's money.'

Gianni Tatti's Dining-Room Chair

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

Auctioneer: 'Sold to the lady whose husband just walked out!'

'And this just in from the stock market... buy, sell, buy, sell, buy, sell, buy!'

"I got it in the sales."

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

Great moments in science. . . 'Nice work, you've isolated the funding gene.'

"Does he have to do that every time he gets a little grant?"

'If at first you don't succeed, admit failure and ask for a bailout.'

'Then one day Ralph decided there isn't anything more important than money, and became a day trader.'

'We've had an application from No.10 Downing Street. . . they need to extend their cabinet room.'

"Dean Williams, the grant committee approved my research grant to determine how many research grants are a waste of government money!"

He's got 'I'm in grant renewal heaven' all over him.

'Enough EBAY already!'

'We need to schedule an autopsy audit to find out what happened here.'

'Tech stocks tumbled on news that Alan Greenspan's computer was down.'

Grants Office Scientific Research Section.

"junior, I'll explain 'taxation' to you, if you explain 'crowdfunding' to me."

A measured response to the budget speech.

"Here we go, blockbuster season..."

Minnesota State Fair.

'It was the best of investment times, it was the worst of investment times...' (A Tale of Two Markets).

"I'm sorry, madam, but these units are for display purposes only."

"Phil's a living legend on this campus. His last grant proposal won a Pulitzer."

'Sitting on the dock of eBay, wasting time...'

"In a perfect world, yes - but you can't claim taxes as a business loss."

Antiques Roadshow or Bust!

'Can you direct me to the publisher of the Harry Potter books?'

"I brought this electric guitar on ebay last week."