Bidding Buff Pillows

The new Yorkshire based auction site: E-bay Gum.

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

'Don't mind him. He gets this wa every time they start talking about the inverse relationship between bond yields and prices.'

Auctioneer: 'Sold to the lady whose husband just walked out!'

"Congratulations! You've won the bid."

(Stocks) (Bonds) (Off Wall St.)

Showing gardening tools to a tower block.

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"I told you everyone would come as a bull or a bear..."

'The buildings are merging.'

'Times are tough, Smith, but I don't want to lay you off. So, to keep you working, I want you to wash our building. That should keep you busy for the next decade.'

'The owners are a bunch of clowns.'

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

Igloo sales

". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."

Turtle Home

'Ok, we've rented the whole building ... oops, they just put on another floor.'

'After looking over your portfolio, I don't think 'enough' will be enough.'

"No, I didn't say, 'health'. I said I'm concerned about your wealth... Can you afford to pay my bill?"

'Well, yes... The cellar IS a bit damp. But therefore the rent is really low!'

Tariff Adjustment

'I handle commodities and Dietrich here specialises in stocks and bonds.'

'What ever happened to that persnickety inspector?'

The King and His Real Estate Advisors

Last painting of a dog for 200 yd

"Did you have any problems at the design stage?"

My definition of 'quality time?'...charging $500 per hour.

"Sorry, I can't explain why, when interest rates rise, bond prices fall."

For Sale By Owner

"Like I told you Gladys: location, location, location."