Biblio-comedian Gifts

Man and his dog both reading Mockingbird books.

'Fyodor Dostoevsky sends weeks describing Alexy Karamazov's quest for a white whale, and then discards the entire chapter."

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

Guide reading book called 'A farewell to arms.'

'Hard to follow...'

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

Plagiarism by Billy Widmore It was the best of times it was the worst of times. Four score and seven years ago, Quoted the raven nevermore...

"Now you're just being a jerk!"

'Bront?saurus.'

Book Worm

"Can you sign this copy I downloaded off the internet?"

"I'm afraid we're going to have to remove your appendix."

'...and what's more, they're all first editions.'

The Farmer Sutra.

'Hey! I just started my James Patterson novel and I'm on chapter 97!' 'You read 20 pages already?'

"What a success! We've sold all our copies. You're a great team! Let's go for beer, pizza and crisps - my treat!"

Meet The Ghostwriter

"At this school we stress critical thinking. And right now I'm very critical of your thinking."

'Bragging at the Old Physicists' & Old Writers' Home.'

Two books from the crime passionel section in a library having sex

'I want something by Anais Nin... but not the naughty Anais Nin!'

'If you must laugh, will you do it in the humour section please?'

Larry's Literary Market.

"Yuck! Som'one left their nose in this book!"

"My book is actually about 12th century Etruscan pottery but I thought it might sell better if I aimed it at the children's market."

'We take late returns very seriously at this library Mr Wilson!'

'Oooh, man... I meant to express that as an interior monologue!' ~ Fred, left to his own literary devices.

"I know it's a foreign book...but I'm reading it with a local accent."

"Books about unicorns? Fantasy section. Next to the biographies of honest politicians."

"Personally, there's nothing I like better than to curl up in bed with a bad woman."

'I see you've dressed to go clubbing.'

Eat, Pray, Love Hot Dogs