Biblio-comedian T-Shirts

Man and his dog both reading Mockingbird books.

'Fyodor Dostoevsky sends weeks describing Alexy Karamazov's quest for a white whale, and then discards the entire chapter."

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

'Hard to follow...'

Guide reading book called 'A farewell to arms.'

I downloaded Thoreau's "Civil Disobedience" into it's memory, and now the "command" key isn't working.

Plagiarism by Billy Widmore It was the best of times it was the worst of times. Four score and seven years ago, Quoted the raven nevermore...

"Now you're just being a jerk!"

'Bront?saurus.'

Book Worm

"Can you sign this copy I downloaded off the internet?"

"I'm afraid we're going to have to remove your appendix."

'...and what's more, they're all first editions.'

N't. Dear, we're commas. Get down here before you get hurt.

The Farmer Sutra.

"What a success! We've sold all our copies. You're a great team! Let's go for beer, pizza and crisps - my treat!"

'Hey! I just started my James Patterson novel and I'm on chapter 97!' 'You read 20 pages already?'

Meet The Ghostwriter

"At this school we stress critical thinking. And right now I'm very critical of your thinking."

"My book is actually about 12th century Etruscan pottery but I thought it might sell better if I aimed it at the children's market."

"Yuck! Som'one left their nose in this book!"

'I want something by Anais Nin... but not the naughty Anais Nin!'

'If you must laugh, will you do it in the humour section please?'

'Bragging at the Old Physicists' & Old Writers' Home.'

Larry's Literary Market.

Two books from the crime passionel section in a library having sex

"When I asked you to read a book, I didn't mean Facebook."

'We take late returns very seriously at this library Mr Wilson!'

'Oooh, man... I meant to express that as an interior monologue!' ~ Fred, left to his own literary devices.

"I know it's a foreign book...but I'm reading it with a local accent."

"Personally, there's nothing I like better than to curl up in bed with a bad woman."

"Books about unicorns? Fantasy section. Next to the biographies of honest politicians."

"Condense this down to a series of memes and we'll take another look at it."

'I see you've dressed to go clubbing.'