Biblically Curious Gifts

"I can't believe I threw all that away for a Cox's pippin!"

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

'Hey, wait a minute...Apples aren't indigenous to this geopraphical region.'

"But what if this is all there is?"

Christian and Born again Christian...

Noah's ark, many lions

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

Adam and Eve, as old people.

"We're in luck, not a word about retrospectivity."

"Great - already running late and then this happens."

"Remember, God created you. Evolution will get you left behind."

'Please Miss, is it where Noah kept his bees?'

"He's dumbing down the sermons again."

Adam and Eve: The Later Years.

Noah wears hearing protection as animals howl.

'Yes, they've been fact-checked!'

'Since you're a teacher, we picked this one from the Tree of Knowledge.'

"I couldn't afford health insurance, so I became a Christian Scientist."

"A reading from the first letter of Paul to the Corinthians..."

'She files things on a biblical basis. Seek and ye shall find.'

'They'll never take my word for it -- You'd better put them in writing.'

"I can't help thinking there's a book in this."

Biblical Procurement Tales: Project Ark.

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

'If there was one thing Methusela hated. It was his Birthday bumps.

'Well yes, son. I imagine some marriages of convenience took place.'

"Seven hundred wives? I'll bet he had a lot of inlaw problems?"

'We're going to need a bigger basket.'

King Solomon's Wedding"You may kiss the brides. You may also kiss the concubines, but don't make a big tzimmes about it."

'Well now, there's a coincidence. We're Adam and Yves too!'

'Oh-oh -- Adam's calling dibs on everything!'

'...Noah really knows how to build an Ark.'

The Joy of Begetting

'Why? Because it's there and I always want to cross it!'

"And you thought you were having a bad hair day."