Beverage Philosopher Gifts

Scariest Tactics

'You're a nihilist, eh? — well, at least you have something to believe in.'

Alcohol 'Nector of the Gods' 'Devils Brew!'

Beer is made by men, wine by god.

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

'I trust these equations settle the argument, Professor Lang. It's your round.'

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

'The secret to life, my friend, is hoppiness!'

"Space is curved and time is relative? Yeah, OK...I'm calling you a cab right now, buddy."

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

Men gossiping

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

Ask not for whom happy hour ends. It ends for thee.

"If it's a series of patterned clicks, I'm not here."

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Buy one beer, get one free. If I may paraphrase a famous quote, "Beer is proof that God has mixed feelings about us and wants us to be hungover."

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

ONE HORSE TOWN

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

'They're not beer stains. This is actually a 'Rorschach test' patterned shirt.'

"You're going to regret this in the morning."