Betting Shop Owner Gifts

Man sees sign on betting shop door listing odds on when the proprietor will come back from lunch.

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

"Actually, make that a double cream."

"He was overly socialized as a puppy."

Cat woman shopping for cats.

'Bert's dog training.'

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

Little league world series of poker.

A day at the races

"He's already getting attached to you."

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

'Come on, I dare you: I say you can't drink a whole dew drop...'

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

'I don't like to take chances.'

Fish with a human in a bowl.

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

'I was hoping for a better bonus this year.'

Sale.

"If there's any one lesson we've learned from the eighties, it's how to shop!"

'He's been there ever since he ate the parrot!'

'I'll take it!'

"Lap fish..."

'If he's only five years old, how come he knows the words to 'See the USA in your Chevrolet'?'

Bob thinks his new neighbor may be bad for business.

'When I said that I needed a new mouse...'

'One final question.. what's your policy on table scraps?'

"Blast, you've cleaned me out again!" Grey squirrels out competing red squirrel for food.

'I'll take him.'

'What do you mean - you 'LET him win'?'