Betting Shop Owner Gifts

Man sees sign on betting shop door listing odds on when the proprietor will come back from lunch.

"Actually, make that a double cream."

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

"He was overly socialized as a puppy."

Cat woman shopping for cats.

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

'Bert's dog training.'

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

Little league world series of poker.

A day at the races

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

'We need you to settle a bet -- was 'Twilight Zone' a sitcom or a documentary?'

'Come on, I dare you: I say you can't drink a whole dew drop...'

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

"He's already getting attached to you."

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

'I don't like to take chances.'

Fish with a human in a bowl.

Cat Show

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

'I was hoping for a better bonus this year.'

Sale.

'I'll take it!'

'One final question.. what's your policy on table scraps?'

"Blast, you've cleaned me out again!" Grey squirrels out competing red squirrel for food.

Bob thinks his new neighbor may be bad for business.

'When I said that I needed a new mouse...'

'If he's only five years old, how come he knows the words to 'See the USA in your Chevrolet'?'

"If there's any one lesson we've learned from the eighties, it's how to shop!"

'I'll take him.'

"Lap fish..."

'He's been there ever since he ate the parrot!'

"He'll only talk when his lawyer's present."