Pet Shop Owner Gifts

'They give you a lot of treats while they're training you, so play dumb for as long as you can.'

'Already got one.' (Cat to a cat salesman selling automatic door openers.)

'I was hoping for a better bonus this year.'

"You knew I was a clean breed when you got me."

"..and you'll also need Percy here, his interpreter"

"There weren't any more clown fishes at the pet shop, so they got me - a jester fish."

State of the Art Dog.

'No, I'm afraid we don't have calendars in dog-years.'

"Relax. Even in a recession, people need rare tropical fighting fish."

"That puppy I bought last week has got very attached to me."

'My hamster fell asleep at the wheel!'

Pet Shops

Siamese fighting fish - 'The other one's his manager.'

Buy me and I'll tell you where Long John Silver buried his treasure!

Pet Shop Vacation

'Sorry, they don't eat homework.'

'Ears up - wag that tail - soulful expression - he is YOURS!'

Fish with a human in a bowl.

'No, Sir! It says 'Exotic Pets! Exotic! Not Erotic!'

"He'll only talk when his lawyer's present."

'You did want him wrapped, didn't you?'

A man and woman giving their mating dogs some privacy.

'Smart? This dog can bark in five different languages!'

"I hear a pet can help prolong your life. Got any that know the Heimlich maneuver?"

Used kangaroos: 'This baby was not only owned by a little old lady, but also has ALL the hoptions'

'He's been there ever since he ate the parrot!'

Fish tanks

'If provoked - his remarks can be scathing.'

'Sorry sir, we only do higher perches!'

Cat Show

'Well, Fred - I see you made the for sale section of the classifieds.'

'Will you get your eyes tested, you've put the hamster in the fish tank!'

"Have you got one that's a bit more pessimistic?"

"Stay away from the piranha tank."

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.