Pet Shop Owner Gifts

'They give you a lot of treats while they're training you, so play dumb for as long as you can.'

'Already got one.' (Cat to a cat salesman selling automatic door openers.)

'I was hoping for a better bonus this year.'

'No, I'm afraid we don't have calendars in dog-years.'

"You knew I was a clean breed when you got me."

"..and you'll also need Percy here, his interpreter"

"There weren't any more clown fishes at the pet shop, so they got me - a jester fish."

State of the Art Dog.

"Relax. Even in a recession, people need rare tropical fighting fish."

'No, Sir! It says 'Exotic Pets! Exotic! Not Erotic!'

Fish with a human in a bowl.

'Ears up - wag that tail - soulful expression - he is YOURS!'

'Sorry, they don't eat homework.'

Pet Shop Vacation

Buy me and I'll tell you where Long John Silver buried his treasure!

Siamese fighting fish - 'The other one's his manager.'

Pet Shops

"That puppy I bought last week has got very attached to me."

'My hamster fell asleep at the wheel!'

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

"Stay away from the piranha tank."

"Have you got one that's a bit more pessimistic?"

'Will you get your eyes tested, you've put the hamster in the fish tank!'

'Well, Fred - I see you made the for sale section of the classifieds.'

'Sorry sir, we only do higher perches!'

'If provoked - his remarks can be scathing.'

'When I said that I needed a new mouse...'

Fish tanks

'You did want him wrapped, didn't you?'

'How do I love thee? Let me count the ways...'

'He's been there ever since he ate the parrot!'

A man and woman giving their mating dogs some privacy.

'Smart? This dog can bark in five different languages!'

"I hear a pet can help prolong your life. Got any that know the Heimlich maneuver?"

Used kangaroos: 'This baby was not only owned by a little old lady, but also has ALL the hoptions'