Bestseller Enthusiast T-Shirts

'If you want to know what really happened, you'll have to buy my new book.'

'Put them there because we can't figure why they're successful!'

Devil Reading The Da Vinci Code.

Best Sellers; Worst Sellers.

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

Thomas Mann.

Nathaniel Hawthorne

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

Television Readers.

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Silence of the Chickens...

The First Draft. . . Moby Duck.

Characters jumping out of a book.

'Stuck on a desert island, in the middle of the ocean, with only a palm tree for company, it's a bloody joke.'

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

Iris Murdoch

"If I Can Make One Critic Smile..."

Sign in a bookshop window offers chance to meet the narrator of the audio book.

My Literary Influences

Kultural K9's.

"There are those who write books to be read and other who write novels for bookshelves."

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

"Regarding the plot of your novel ... what on earth were you thinking?"

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

Tolstoy and Dostoevsky plan a collaboration - 'War and Punishment'... it'll make us a bundle.

Editor.

'Is this your first book launch?'

Temporary and Permanent Writer's Block

'Tommy's book reports are like no other.'

Little boy reading a classic whilst his Dad reads a comic.

Book Lovers in Richmond

Library

"Tom's writing has been going really well! He's written over 200,000 words. Now he just needs to work out what order to put them in!"