Bench Buddies T-Shirts

We're visiting the marine who's home on leave. Bye! Don't hurry! Sweet! We can hang here! Mmm

"Yeah, he's cute but don't approach him. He's a service human."

"He was into feet, but, unforunately, not duck feet."

Man and dog on exercise bikes.

"Call me a taxi if I start foaming at the mouth."

"Beer? I see you taught Roscoe to fetch?"

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

"We've got the same ringtone!" (Two guys opening ring pull drinks cans).

"Hey. We’re in the doghouse every night. That’s the beauty of it."

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

"I've tried 5 diets and haven't lost a pound. Maybe I shouldn't try them all at the same time."

Band alternating between whiney and angry songs.

"Do you know what girls want?"

'Listen Mabel, you are 70, I am 75 and we have known each other since junior school. It's pure wishful thinking on your part if you claim I am 'grooming' you...'

"Is that 'good reptilian' or 'bad reptilian'?"

"It's a deal: Two more years, then we let ourselves go."

Liquor Store - Gift Suggestions.

"Fascinating!"

"We've been married so long you not only finish my sentences you start 'em too."

The Icebreaker

"It's OK, girl. I get tired, too."

'3 pints of lager, 2 gin and tonic, 1 vodka and coke and a replacement liver.'

This plaque commemorates the trees that was cut down to make space for this bench.

"She's high maintenance. I love her."

"Had half of Fox-and-Friends gnawing my ass this morning."

'Wait! -- Why don't we just have a BEER bash?'

"Sure, I had a retirement plan. Stop going to work"

Two men are jogging. One is noticing 'Danger Wide Load' sign on back of other.

"Forty years ago on this very seat I proposed to you. Made up your mind yet?"

'My name is Judge Clyde Sandorf; better known as 'ol' tough as nails'.'

"At our age I figure we only have two taste buds left. One for vodka and one for wine."

Sports Bar ???

'Stop it! Stop it, you two! If you keep fighting about it, then neither one of you will get to be 'coach's bench buddy'...'

'It was Bob's last wish to spread his ashes on the spot where he spent most of his athletic career.'

Bee Bar