Beer Belly Warrior Gifts

'Can you touch your toes?'

Yoga for Alcoholics

Body by Jake

'My arms are getting shorter.'

'Oi! '

'I figured I was in hell when I saw the wine list - 800 selections, and they're all white zinfandels.'

'I'm having trouble with drinking. . . I'm getting Arthritis in my elbow.'

BEER BELLY

"Is there anyone here who specializes in stress management?"

"Looks like the universe isn't the only thing that' s expanding!"

"Carpe vino! Seize the wine!"

Man battles for his life against 'A Very Lively Little Red'

'The trend toward less alcohol consumption at office parties is having a bad effect on my health. Wine cooler bottles are heavier than beer cans.'

Ginger Breadman

"Is it safe to assume that the meat is laced with antibiotics and the salad is chockfull of pesticides?"

'I'm from down the street. Your customer ordered our wine because it is better than yours.'

"It's a mug's game!"

'Quiet you!'

"thanks for all your efforts Harry, but I am still going to have to sell the place."

Amazing new parenting methods...No. 94, preventing obesity.

'Thank you for this food, and protect us from the additives and preservatives therin.'

"It seems an ungrateful and disrespectful monster has taken over Baldo's brain."

Innovate - man boobs and gut bra.

I just watched a documentary about the dangers of drinking and it petrified me. No more TV for me!

''Light' beer bottles. Somewhere there's a slob on a diet.'

' I don't want a nice little wine - get me something aggressive !! '

I still think the anti-personnel mines are a bit over the top.

'Well, if it isn't the guy wiith the draggin' tattoo!'

'Jim should call his home brew Lottery Ticket - there's about a 1-in-50-million chance of being happy with it.'

To help relieve the strain on their backs, many men are using beer-belly strollers.

'I was like working at burger buddies and this guy was mad because his fries were like old and stuff...'

Getting in shape (or not)

'We caught him with this up his jumper, trying to join the darts team under false pretences.'

Feeling inadequate around his drinking buddies, Warren began to wear a prosthetic beer gut.

Witness the power of this fully operational battle station