Beer Belly Battler Gifts

Getting in shape (or not)

Body by Jake

Run, Mike, Run!

'My arms are getting shorter.'

'This isn't Armageddon... it's a bar brawl on a Saturday night. Let Pestilence read the map.'

Big Burgers.

"Don't mess with that guy. He's a real hardwood."

Cat wakes up owner demanding to be fed.

BEER BELLY

"Looks like the universe isn't the only thing that' s expanding!"

Man battles for his life against 'A Very Lively Little Red'

(Carl's Sports Bar) - 'Hockey Sucks!!' - Although Earl had made good on his dare, it would be weeks before he could eat solid food again.

'Because I paid ten bucks for that lure, that's why.'

'I was aiming at mama but she ducked faster than you.'

"You started a fist fight in a bar, eh? We'd better cut you back on the male hormones."

Knights of the Coffee Table

Innovate - man boobs and gut bra.

Happy Hour, 10 minute breaks for fights.

'Next time, I go in the bar to ask directions!'

"thanks for all your efforts Harry, but I am still going to have to sell the place."

"It's a mug's game!"

'Quiet you!'

''Light' beer bottles. Somewhere there's a slob on a diet.'

'I just read your blog. Do you want to settle this on or off line?'

To help relieve the strain on their backs, many men are using beer-belly strollers.

Milton applies for a job as a video game tester.

'Well, if it isn't the guy wiith the draggin' tattoo!'

"Can you give me about 5 minutes? I'm about to beat this level!"

'We caught him with this up his jumper, trying to join the darts team under false pretences.'

'Can you touch your toes?'

Man with a football tattooed onto his stomach.

"He's still hoping that drinking might become an Olympic sport."

". . . So tell me Mr. Confirmed Bachelor. . . why did you get married?"

Feeling inadequate around his drinking buddies, Warren began to wear a prosthetic beer gut.

'Let him struggle; it's the only exercise he gets.'