Becoming A Senior Citizen Gifts

'Face it dear, we are as old as we look!'

'First you're older than the baseball players, then you're older than the president, then you're older than everyone on the Supreme Court...'

'We all shrink as we get older... You'll just have to be a little patient!'

"I'm trying to figure out when I flipped from being a baby boomer to a senior citizen."

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

Senior Jeopardy!

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

Netanyahu versus Gantz

Lilly was too far from the phone to complain about her new stairlift.

"Take a look - that's us in ninety years."

"Don't think of this birthday as you're getting older. Think of it as being one day closer to irritable bowel syndrome."

Road rage on a mobility scooter.

"I get it! I get it! Elephants never forget. Now quit bragging about it!"

'Relax - we're retired, we don't have any teeth.'

"We settled into the one-level after our hips got bad."

Getting older is...making noises whenever you bend down or get back up.

"Sure I'm depressed - now they got me on this geriatric dog food."

"Well, it all depends. Where are these huddled masses coming from?"

Pensioner's Romance

"You want the truth? I can't remember the truth!"

A man with a walking frame breaks a wheel and hitches a ride with a man on a mobility scooter.

"The wattle fairy came again last night."

"America's Funniest Colonoscopy Videos."

"I'm thinking of letting my bangs grow out."

'I still have all my own teeth.'

'Ain't it great, Wally, to be over the hill and not under it!'

You know you're getting old... when your barber spends more time on your eyebrows and ears than on the hairs on your head.

Old Golfers never die...only those who get in their buggies way!

Pension in race with tortoise and snail.

"Last one to the top's a geriatric."

"I'm trying to determine if the aches and pains are from an injury or just my new normal."

'I feel just like a newborn baby. . . Yes, no hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.'

"The older I get, the more I change from a lounge lizard into a bathroom lizard..."

Pensioners - Old ink Pens at the park sitting and walking