Beauty Junkie Pillows

"Do you ever think you might be overdoing the whole moisturiser thing?"

"Now, open your cosmetics fridge and delicately apply the cold hard cash to the area around your eyes."

'My friend here would like to try the Brazilian.'

'These facial wraps work great on dead skin.'

Bad hair day!

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

Dating is so expensive...

Pampered and poodled.

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

Could you see anything in her? I certainly couldn't! (Man's eyes are popping out of his head).

'Wrinkles can't breathe in mud.'

"I don't like your application."

What price beauty?

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

'Maybe I should get a shopping cart.'

"Who's a pretty girl now?"

'I'm not begging, I've just painted my claws.'

"Don't worry about your hair, dear, I can fix it in post-production."

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

Your presentation will be terrific. I was up all night, but something's still missing. Here. I've got just what you need. How thoughtful! Eye concealer! No need to thank me.

"Hair spray"

New Twenty Blades

It was time for a little bit of lady admin

"Remember when we were Instagram models?"

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

Beauty salon - Our hair color is to dye for!

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.